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Requirements For My Next…

November 14, 2012 - Author: KishaLynn Elliott

Does the ____ that showed up fit the bill? Give it a score and find out!

Here’s a funny new word that I’ve coined. It’s ok, I’m allowed to make up my own words. You can do it too, if having my permission means anything to you.

The word is “arafeminex” and it’s definition is ‘the requirements for my next _______’.

I’m not sure if this will catch on in the world at large, but since it’s just you and I right now, let me share with you what it has done for me.

I created my first arafeminex back in 2005, way before I ever learned about how This Stuff’s Working! But, once I learned about the Law of Attraction, I realized that the tool I created was attraction in action. It was me expressing my desire, in detail, focusing on exactly what I wanted, and believing it was possible for myself so much that I refused to settle for less.

Back then, I was looking for my next relationship. I had been single for several months and was going on one disastrous date after the other. I was chasing after people that weren’t interested in dating me and running from people I wasn’t interested in dating. It was frustrating and I felt like I was wasting time, energy and money, yet not enjoying life. At the time, I was a complainer and a blamer. Boy, did I complain. I also blamed the city I had just moved to, Los Angeles, for the drama and dissatisfaction I was experiencing on the social dating scene.

After one particular dramatic bad date, I decided I’d had enough. My dating life was horrible, but I did have plenty of fun when just hanging out with my new friends. I also really enjoyed my alone time. (I had been in intensely dependent back to back relationships for the prior three years.) So I made a conscious decision to stop dating, stop pursuing, and stop looking for love. I would just enjoy life, enjoy my new friends, my new city, my new job. I would enjoy myself. I used the spare time to get very clear on exactly what I wanted.

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I opened up a document on my computer and created my first arafeminex, then titled Requirements For My Next Girlfriend (arafemingee-ef) On it, I listed out three PRE-REQUISITES to be met before I would even say yes to or ask for a first date. Then beneath that, I listed out the additional requirements by which those that I chose to go on a date with would be scored.

Once my arafemingee-ef was instituted, life got easier almost immediately. I went on a couple of dates with people that met the pre-requisites. After the date, I assigned them a score on my arafemingee-ef and then had an honest conversation with myself about whether or not I wanted to date them further.

What was amazing about the process is that those early arafemingee-efs revealed that I was NOT really into the person I had dated. I might have known that already inside, but seeing it on paper like that really helped me to REALIZE it, and make a conscious decision that would free me from drama and unhappiness. It also helped prevent me from ruining friendships.

So, if the person didn’t “pass”, it was easier for me to make the decision not to date them further based on something more tangible than my gut. Over the following few months, I completed three arafemingee-ef assessments before I met someone that got high scores on it. Wouldn’t you know, that one was THE ONE! In July 2013, we’ll have been together for seven years and have been ridiculously happily married for five years.

The arafeminex is great because if you have one, it means you’ve taking the crucial extra step beyond simply expressing what you want or need. You have focused on the Desire enough to clearly define its elements and its essence. By establishing these qualifications, you have a means to assess your progress towards what you want and a way to evaluate whether or not what shows up in your experience is an ACTUAL manifestation of your Desire, or something else.

It’s easy to want. It can be challenging to drill down into the details, and clearly define the full picture of what you want. Having an arafeminex gives you a very good start towards examining what you want, and making it happen.

I believe we should all have some arafeminex in our lives. I am sure you actually have some right now.

What are the requirements for your next job? Your next relationship? Your next home? Your next trip? Your next _______?

What elements, characteristics and traits that must be present in order for the next ______ to be allowed access to your life?

What characteristics must NOT be present? (The things you don’t want tell you a lot about what you do want.)

You have the power to shape your life. Make your measure of success a matter of how CLOSE what you’re manifesting in your life is to what you truly want. Have the courage to say “No thanks” to the things that don’t meet the criteria.

No Comments - Categories: Desire, DREAM

Tackling Procrastination and the I Don’t Feel Like Its

October 5, 2012 - Author: KishaLynn Elliott
How to Get Things Done Image

LOL Just kidding…but seriously though…

When was the last time you procrastinated on taking Action towards a Desire?

Did that happen this week? Today? Are you doing it right now? (*gasp* No! Of course not!)

Not getting something done usually has nothing to do with your ability to manage the task. Most likely the reason that whatever you were supposed to do didn’t get done was because of these five words:

“I don’t feel like it.”

Think about these words and what happens in your life when you use them.

Like attracts like. So, if you have a Desire, but whenever you face taking the necessary Action to get it, you say, “I don’t feel like it” what you are really putting out is, “I don’t want that.” You are also attracting that back. Is “I don’t want that.” true when it comes to your Desire? Hopefully not! Otherwise, it’s hardly a Desire at all.

So then, the next question is, why waste time on a Desire that that you don’t feel like? It sounds ridiculous but we do it all the time when we procrastinate.

Relax. I am here to tell you that laziness is NOT the problem. You are not lazy, nor do you lack drive or ambition. If that were the case, you wouldn’t have any interest in personal development and you would have clicked away from here a long time ago. Lack of focus isn’t the problem either. You are PLENTY focused on something–just in a counteractive and downright destructive way.

The problem is the resulting Emotional Energy that results from focusing on the “I Don’t Feel Like It” thought. So, let’s break it down…

First, you must confirm that the Desire is truly a Desire of yours. If you DON’T feel like taking the Action necessary to achieve your Desire, then feeling that way is telling you that something in your thinking needs adjustment. Simply put, we are the most motivated to do the things we want most. If you are lacking motivation to get moving, then that Desire needs tweaking. Redefine it until it’s such a burning Desire that nothing can stop you from feeling like it.

If the Desire IS something you truly want, then you must adjust your thinking and find ways to shift your Emotional Energy into alignment with the Desire so that you do feel like it. Emotional Energy is what propels you to take immediate inspired Action. In other words, feeling like it is the first necessary Action.

Anytime you catch yourself saying, “I don’t feel like it”, STOP.

Realize that thoughts become things. Because the “I don’t feel like it” thought is focused enough to generate strong Emotional Energy that resists your Desire, continuing along those mental lines will jeopardize your ability to ever see the Desire Manifested.

Like thoughts attract like things. If you don’t stop yourself in the act of thinking, “I don’t feel like it”, then you will attract more of those thoughts and more of the resisting Emotional Energy that goes with them. You’ll remain slow or stuck. Before you know it, best case scenario, time has passed and you haven’t gotten much closer to your Desire. Worst case scenario, you’re creating a big(ger) mess in your experience. Yeah buddy, This Stuff’s Working! Unfortunately, it’s working against you.

How do you change it?

The simplest answer is really to think and feel the right way. The right way to think and feel is the way that is completely connected to and aligned with your Desire.

Contemplate your Desire for a moment. Really, get it in your mind. Put it in your own face and say, “I want this and I will have it.” If it’s true, you will mean it. If it’s not true, then scrap that version of the Desire and find one that is.

Once you have affirmed the Desire, affirm that you are prepared to take Action. Say to yourself, in as excited a tone as you can muster, “I am inspired to take Action now!” You might not feel or believe it at first, but keep going. You just affirmed that this IS a Desire of yours, so don’t give up on it, or yourself. Instead, push yourself! You must rouse within yourself a genuine excitement for your Desire, and you can if it is something that you truly want.

Then, focus on the specific Actions you need to take. Bring each task to mind one at a time, and as you do, tell yourself that you do feel like doing it. Really focus for a minute on implanting this thought firmly in your mind around each Action you need to take. Say out loud (replacing ‘this Action’ with the specific tasks):

“I am excited about taking this Action!”
“I can’t wait to get started on this Action!”
“I will really enjoy taking this Action!”
“I will feel so great doing this Action!”
“I will be so happy when this Action is completed!
“I can’t wait to finish this Action so that I can move on to that Action!”

You may start out repeating these statements out loud and feel a little awkward doing so. You might even feel like it’s bull. You may have heard of “fake it till you make it”, but that is NOT the advice here; no one is advising you to fake feeling motivated. The key here is to actually generate motivation within yourself, authentically, by using your ability to focus your thoughts until there is a shift in your Emotional Energy.

This shift comes gradually as you continue to concentrate on the thoughts with intentionality. We don’t leap from zero to a 60 on the Emotional Energy freeway. Remember, every thought builds upon itself in the mind, creating more like thoughts. If you persist in these thoughts, and you continue to affirm readiness to take Action, then no matter how it feels at first,you WILL begin to draw in more thoughts like them. You will begin to feel differently.

Here’s the wonderful thing about how This Stuff’s Working! Once your thoughts becomes aligned with your Desire, your Emotional Energy follows and you will begin to truly feel the way you need to feel to take immediate inspired Action. You will feel it the moment it switches on for you. Don’t walk away from this process until that happens.

Once it does happen, and it will if you don’t give up, begin taking Action immediately. You will find yourself able to because, guess what? Now you feel like it! When you take Action from within that “I feel good and I feel like it” place, the doing can even be easier and more enjoyable that you imagined. You might  later wonder what the big deal was and why you waited so long to take Action in the first place.

It is absolutely necessary that you learn to do this entire process with yourself. Doing so puts you in the “I feel good and I feel like it” place, creating a shift in your Emotional Energy. Then you’ll start moving and doing, taking immediate inspired Action. Before you know it, worst case scenario, you’re getting the things you need to do done, and that is never a bad thing. Best case scenario is that you attract the Desire and create something wonderful in your experience. Yeah baby! This Stuff’s Working! And you are working it!

This will confirm for you just how powerful and in control you are of yourself and your life. Once you grasp how This Stuff’s Working! you can literally become unstoppable in your Action. Then you will quickly lose count of all the Desires you have Manifested.

Shifting your thoughts and feelings into alignment with your true Desire is often the challenge slows you down the most, or halts you in your tracks the longest. If you conquer this process, then you will soon stifle the temptation to procrastinate. The most effective will eliminate procrastination all together.

Once you hold a Manifested Desire in your hand, you may even end up reflecting that actually taking Action was the easiest part!

4 Comments - Categories: Action-Procrastination, DREAM

Thoughts Become Things – Your Mental Traffic Light

September 28, 2012 - Author: KishaLynn Elliott

Let’s try something…

Visualize in your mind that you are driving down a road. There’s a little traffic, but it’s moving freely at the speed limit.

Ahead is an intersection with a traffic light. The light is green, but as you approach, it turns yellow for a brief moment, then quickly changes to red. Traffic stops. You stop with it. You sit and wait. Then, the light turns green, and traffic begins to move again. You move along with it.

This simple and familiar routine that drivers experience everyday is a perfect metaphor for the Law of Attraction, or This Stuff, and how it’s working. The Law of Attraction says that like attracts like and your thoughts become things.

If you imagine that thoughts about your Desires are the green light, then you can imagine that when you are thinking those thoughts, you are able to move freely and closer towards them. You can plan. You can organize and use your resources. You can act and attract. Green means Go.

But there is a tendency to slow things down with the same tool–thoughts. If you begin to think thoughts that are unclear, doubtful, or apathetic, they become the yellow light. Progress towards what you want slows down. Yellow means Slow. It’s also a warning of an impending red light. A yellow light doesn’t last long before becoming red.

When you begin to think thoughts that don’t align with the Desire, such as thoughts of lack or impossibility, the light changes to red, and you MUST stop. Red means No. Your progress towards what you want is halted, because you do not see the green light anymore–your Desire.

So, you sit, and wait.
Red light (LACK: I don’t have it…)
Red light (IMPOSSIBLE: …and I can’t…)
Red light (EXCUSE: …because of…)

Then, maybe you grow irritated (more red light).
You get impatient (more red light).
You become angry (more red light).
Then, because nothing is happening at this red light, you may begin to feel hopeless, and that the effort is futile (STOP!)

The great news is that red lights don’t remain red forever.

While driving on an actual road, you don’t have control over the timing of traffic lights. However, you do have complete control over the traffic signal of your focused thoughts.

More good news is that from red light thoughts, can jump IMMEDIATELY back to green, quickly and safely, by shifting your thoughts back to the Desire and your plan to achieve it.

As soon as you do, things get moving again, and you can continue on the journey towards destination Manifested! Assuming you don’t keep catching the red lights…

You can use visualization to help you keep your thoughts on track. For example, the next time you’re at a traffic light, assuming it’s safe to do so, take a moment to observe it in relation to your thoughts. Or, you can save and print this image:

Thoughts Become Things

Post it where you can see it often. Use it to remind yourself of how This Stuff’s Working! Whenever you see this image, or a real traffic light, assess the condition of your thoughts in that moment. Is your mental traffic light green, moving you towards your Desire? Are you working your plan as you coast through the green light?

Is your mental traffic light yellow with fear, worry, anger or whatever slowing you down?

Or, are you sitting at a mental red light with thoughts that oppose your Desire altogether?

By using this visual aide, you will become more aware of your thoughts, and grow inspired to keep your mental traffic light green at all costs. That means you’ll keep your focus on the Desire and your plan to Manifest it.

Nothing can stop you but you.

No Comments - Categories: DREAM